It is often stated, especially during crises, that "God promises not to give us more than we can bear." But is this true? Although the ones who say this mean well, and are perhaps praying for the person going through the crisis, the statement should be thoroughly evaluated against Scripture to see if it holds up to the Truth of God's Word. Clue: it doesn't!
Context
The verse from which this statement is derived is found in 1 Corinthians 10:13, which says, "No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful, and He will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation He will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it." At first glance, it would seem I am clearly not seeing what the verse says, and should stop writing now in order to not make a fool out myself. But, look again.
In context, Paul is speaking about temptations, specifically the temptations to do something that does not please God. He uses the Israelites as an example of what not to do: be idolaters (v. 7), act immorally (v. 8), try the Lord (v. 9), nor grumble at God (v. 10). As the previous verse states (v. 12), be careful not to fall into temptation and get into trouble: "therefore let him who thinks he stands take heed that he does not fall." Although the Greek word used can also mean trials, it is noteworthy that most translations prefer to use the word "temptation" instead—the context dictates which meaning is intended.
Furthermore, people tend to forget the rest of the verse, "with the temptation, He will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it." If this verse were talking about trials and crises (such as health issues or the death of a loved one), it would make no sense to say that God would give us the way of escape from, say, an incurable disease like cancer. Would He be lying, then, if He didn't provide an escape from such a trial? God forbid anyone ever thinks that way. This is not what that verse teaches.
What About Job and Paul?
As if that weren't enough, taking this verse to mean that God would not give us anything we couldn't handle, then what of Job's story? He was a righteous man, loved by God, yet Satan was allowed to greatly hurt him and cause him many trials, probably more than most of us could bear. And also, what of Paul's recollection of his trials in 2 Corinthians 1:8, "For we do not want you to be unaware, brothers, of the affliction we experienced in Asia. For we were so utterly burdened beyond our strength that we despaired of life itself." Even Paul was tried beyond what he could bear. And wasn't Christ tried beyond what He could bear? Think about it.
The informed truth is that God WILL certainly allow trials in our lives that are beyond our ability to bear...on our own! You see, God allows certain trials and tribulations in our lives in order for us to depend on Him for our strength, and not on our feeble selves. He makes us weak so that He can make us strong. When we're at the end of our ropes, God wants us to call on Him to save us and give us strength. Paul clears things up for us in verse 9, "But that was to make us rely not on ourselves but on God who raises the dead."
Speak the Truth in Love
So, the next time you want to console someone by saying "don't worry, God won't give you more than you can bear," don't do it! Those words can damage that person's view of God once they feel and realize that they really cannot bear their trials. Instead, after praying for them, say to them something like, "Don't worry, God is in control of everything, and His Word says that all things work together for the good of those who love Him. You love Him and trust in Him, so ask Him and trust Him to give you strength, even if what you're going through is not taken from you. Jesus knows our pains and struggles, but He promises that He is always with us...through it all. Find your joy in knowing that you know God and that He knows you. Pray to Him, and seek Him like never before, and He will give you strength and an unshakable joy in the midst of all of this. I will continue praying for you."
May God Bless You.
Recommended Resources
